I find
it quite peculiar that so many Christians are consumed by issues like
homosexuality, women bishops, divorcees remarrying, and those kinds of issues
with which so many church members are preoccupied. I don’t know why they get so
uptight about these things, because virtually nobody that peddles this
propaganda really believes it - it’s just the case that they have been swayed
by the impetus of the cultural power that underwrites these issues.
Christians
think they are against them, because it’s so easy to create a mental label and
then proceed to attack that label – but I think it’s simply the case that the
belief that they are against them is more empowering than their actual level of
objection. One is reminded of Coleridge’s criticism; “You do not believe; you only believe that you believe”.
I
believe, based on what my recesses tell me, that I went to a Middle School
disco in 1985. I haven’t given the matter much thought for years. If someone
asked me how sure I was that the disco was in 1985, I’d say I think it was, but
I might be a year or so out. If you proved to me that the disco was in 1984 I
wouldn’t be very alarmed to find out I was one year out, because I don’t hold
the belief rigidly.
That’s
what I think the issues of homosexuality, women bishops, divorcees remarrying,
etc are like for those who get upset about them – they believe their beliefs
are honestly felt, but I think if you asked them to subject themselves to some
brutal self-honesty you would find that those beliefs are more culturally
driven – rather like an infection that gets passed on from Christian to
Christian. Put it this way – if you’d have given these people a Bible and left
each of them alone with it from childhood on a desert island with a lifetime supply of
food and drink, I don’t think you would find when you returned in 30 years that
they had adopted all these prejudices.
I think
the reasons are fairly straightforward – why on earth should you be bothered
about whether a homosexual couple decides to express their love for one another
with a civil partnership? Why should you care if a once divorced woman finds
love again and wants to express that love by getting remarried in a CofE
church? Why get so uptight about the many talented women who demonstrate their gifts and abilities
in church leadership? Why should Catholics care if a couple wants to use
contraception, or if a non-Catholic wishes to take communion in a Catholic
Church when visiting the church? These people aren’t doing any harm to
you.
What
does anybody actually gain from condemning a woman bishop or a homosexual
couple? Nothing, as far as I can
tell. What they lose though is a lot,
because humans really ought to minimise suffering as much as possible – and
believe me, people who are ostracised or marginlised do suffer the effects of
this stigmatisation. They are made to feel like they always have to be on the
defensive – and many times they come away from church life quite hurt and
despondent.
Here’s
the other thing; no one is saying you have to accept homosexuals or divorcees
or women bishops – if acceptance really isn’t in your constitution then you are
free to think as you see fit. But I think you would be more blessed and
emotionally renewed if you could find it in your heart to accept those you
denounce. Your hostility isn’t going to make a gay man straight, nor will it
turn a female vicar away from the church. But your refusal to publicly condemn
and your willingness to keep it as a private frustration will be a good thing –
because it admits the humility of saying ‘I might be wrong about this issue, so
I’ll err on the side of caution’. By all means let us speak out against things
we feel called to challenge; but let’s use some sense of prudence is working
out what the real core problems are. Then it might become clear that people’s gender
or past mistakes or sexual orientation are none of our business.
In order
to give yourself the best chance of making a sound judgement, try this little
exercise. Whenever you are arguing for
or against what you feel to be one of the big issues, pretend you have to put
yourself in the shoes of the person with whom you disagree. Next, use all the
knowledge and brainpower you have to argue his (or her) position for him on his
behalf. One cannot easily fail to appreciate the other person’s position once
one has made an honest and persuasive effort to defend it. There is something
quite noble in trying to defend the position opposite to one’s own; it will
certainly help the formation of a balanced view, and will either give you
better reasons to justify your original belief or it will give you a
perspective of the opposite belief that you didn’t previously have. Either way
your position is strengthened, and your life journey will be more enriched.
